Cathy and her husband Ray were married for three years, trying to conceive for almost as long with no luck. They eventually did get their baby, but it was from the last place they were expecting and that baby gave them the hope they needed when they needed it the most.
After a year of trying the “natural way,” Ray and Cathy started the process of going to various medical professionals to find out why they were not having any success getting pregnant. Ray and Cathy went through countless pokes, prods, scrapes, and all other kinds of medical testing, but both of their tests came back negative. Two healthy adults in their early thirties should have been able to conceive without issue. They were anxious to start a family so after three unsuccessful attempts at artificial insemination, they moved quickly onto IVF.
The first round of IVF did not result in a pregnancy. The second attempt resulted in a positive home pregnancy test on Christmas Day, giving them the best Christmas present they could have hoped for. But that joy was short lived because the result turned out to be a “chemical pregnancy,” where there was technically a pregnancy, but not for more than a day or two. The second round of IVF resulted in no viable embryos. They were devastated. Their other friends who had experienced infertility had been a source of support and sharing. However, these friends too had become pregnant and were moving on with their lives.
It was at that time that Cathy sought help with a Resolve support group. The process of sharing her journey with others helped her heal and find strength that she didn’t think she had any longer. She was feeling depressed and her friends and family knew she needed something to lift her.
Cathy had been an equestrian her entire life, riding horses from childhood, but never being able to afford to own her own horse because of the expense. When a horse she had missed out on buying had come up for sale again shortly after the last IVF attempt, she thought it may be the right time to finally make that dream come true. So, with Ray’s blessing and her parents’ help, she brought home her dream horse. She knew the moment the horse arrived home would be emotional so she had Ray record her reaction so her mother could watch it later. Cathy was moved to tears with joy and relief, hugging her horse trainer and Ray, who had all helped make it happen.
Cathy then posted the video on social media and revealed to all her friends, family, and colleagues that she and Ray had been struggling with infertility. She explained why it was so meaningful to accomplish one of her dreams and that even through infertility, good things would still happen for her and for anyone else experiencing the same struggle.
And as it turned out, that horse was the one who was unexpectedly pregnant. Cathy and Ray had their baby (horse) 19 days later! Another round of IVF several months later finally revealed a diagnosis, a balanced translocation of Cathy’s chromosomes, something which IVF can not “fix.” But having two horses to take care of gave Cathy happiness on even the darkest days. As of this writing, Ray and Cathy are setting up a nursery because they are in the process of adopting and are waiting on a birth mother to choose them.
Through the experience Cathy learned that, when the time is right, sharing pain can help heal. And even though the most difficult of times, unexpected good things will still happen.
Cathy C., Florida