Lara married the love of her life and best friend, Trey, four years ago. The two met when they were freshmen in college, and knew right away they wanted to marry. Lara and Trey waited until Lara was done with grad school before marrying. Although they had been together for nearly eight years when they were married, they had decided to put off trying to start a family because Trey was in the Navy and Lara was only working part time at her job at the time. Both felt proud of themselves because they thought that they were being responsible and that waiting was the right thing to do.
Lara’s wakeup call came in the summer of 2014. She felt that something was definitely wrong and finally scheduled an appointment with her OB-GYN. After several tests, one of which was to check for cancer; it felt like the most terrifying twenty-four hours of Lara’s entire life. She was eventually given a diagnosis of PCOS. The next steps that followed was to immediately begin Clomid, which unfortunately was not successful for Lara. Then at that point the couple was referred to a RE. After trying Letrozole and injectables they still stared down at negative pregnancy tests. The couple is now currently saving money to start IVF this summer.
“We are already preparing to be parents. I have a “mom car” and we bought a house with enough room to grow into. The room next to ours is “the baby’s room” but there is no baby to put in it. I have my husband’s baby blankets to put on a crib that I can’t buy yet. My heart aches to be a mother. I have always had a vision of us as parents; lots of kids running around, taking vacations, teaching them about the world. How Trey would have to be the one to help them with their math homework because I hate math, and how sad and proud I would be when they left home for college. I can see all this for us; we are already parents, but without children. I fell in love with Trey for so many reasons: his sense of humor, his intelligence, and how he makes me feel loved and cherished. He has all those amazing qualities that great dads have, and it hurts me so much that I am the reason he is not a father.”
Like so many couples who experience infertility, Lara and Trey’s journey has been lonely and extremely challenging. They have felt many raw emotions and have gone through ordeals the couple never could have imagined. Lara even went through a very rough period, a blackness that Lara struggled to pull from. She felt like she could not do it alone; only with the help of their family and a supportive husband did Lara finally start accepting, but never liking, what they were going through. Lara decided then that she would never let someone feel as alone as she felt; that she would always give another woman, another couple her hand, her shoulder, her ear, whatever they needed to make it through.
Because no one should go through infertility alone.
Lara & Trey F. ,Virginia