As a young girl, I always knew I wanted to be a mother. I never thought at 41 I would be on an infertility journey. When I finished high school, I went into finance, but it wasn’t my dream. I decided to go to culinary school at 26, finished culinary school, and worked nonstop for 13 years building my culinary career. My health wasn’t the greatest because I worked so much and didn’t eat healthy or rest. What was I doing to myself?

I made a change, started taking care of myself and lost over 70lbs! The next thing I knew, I was pregnant! I had waited for this moment for a long time. I was 38 and had a normal pregnancy until 19 weeks. One morning I woke up and was spotting. I was so afraid, but my doctor told me to stay on bed rest for a few days. I went to the ER where everything looked fine and was sent home. Two days later, I started bleeding heavily, so I went back to the ER and discovered I was in labor. After being admitted, I delivered a beautiful, perfect boy, but he was too early to survive. I was devastated.

I learned I had an incompetent cervix and was told I would need a cerclage to reinforce my cervix (if we got pregnant again). We tried for one year after our loss and right before the big 4-0, I took a pregnancy test – it was positive! I was excited, overwhelmed, and scared because of my previous experience. I called my doctor and at my next appointment, we saw a strong heartbeat at ten weeks! On my second appointment, there was no heartbeat. We were devastated again. I took medication to pass our baby which was one of the worst feelings of my life.

My OBGYN suggested I see a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE), so we went and had all the required tests done. I found out I was born with a septum in my uterus – a congenital malformation where the uterine cavity is divided by a longitudinal septum – which can be corrected with surgery. I also discovered I was having an issue with ovulation. My ovarian reserve and egg quality were still good for my age, so I had the surgery and waited eight weeks before trying again.

We tried ovulation induction to increase our chances, but neither round was successful. I was exhausted mentally and physically. I took some time off from treatments but continued to do fertility acupuncture. I was going to do three to four months of fertility acupuncture to get my body prepared for IVF, then Covid-19 happened. Now, we are at a standstill waiting to move forward. I wonder if my time has run out, but I want to #changetheconversation by saying I won’t give up faith! I believe God is faithful, and he will complete our family. Age is just a number, but faith is forever.

Vernetta S.